Maid Service
by Caz Malfoy
Summary: Who cleans with lube in their pocket?


**Title: **Maid Service  
**Fandom: **Torchwood  
**Rating: **FRAO  
**Pairing: **Jack/Ianto  
**Summary: **Who cleans with lube in their pocket?  
**Warning: **Cross-dressing/drag

x

Ianto Jones kicked the door open and stumbled into his flat, only barely remembering to lock the door behind him. He was exhausted, the rift had been playing up all week and they were constantly finding themselves facing new and menacing aliens each day.

The entire team had barely slept since the previous Thursday and even though their boss could survive on a few hours sleep, pulling twenty-hour shifts every day was not good for anyone's mental state, or overall team morale.

Almost all the lights were off in the apartment and he very nearly tripped over the wire that connected the vacuum cleaner to the mains socket in the hall. In the back of his mind he wondered what his partner had been thinking when he decided to clean in the dark, but that thought was quickly banished by the sight that met him when he arrived in the kitchen.

Standing by the sink, wearing a loose dress – it was loose enough to be comfortable, but not too big to look ridiculous – was his lover, and boss, wearing yellow marigolds and doing the dishes. The stereo in the corner was on and Ianto noticed Jack was swaying his hips to the music and one stocking clad foot was tapping along to the beat.

"Hey," he whispered, slowly crossing the room and sliding his hands around the other's waist, only then noticing that Jack was wearing an apron.

Jack turned his head and gave Ianto a quick kiss, before returning to the plates and glasses in the sink. "You're late," he murmured, placing one plate on the draining board and reaching for another.

"If my boss hadn't ducked out of work early, I wouldn't have had to do it on my own and I would have been home sooner," Ianto retorted, only half joking.

Jack laughed loud and shook his head. "I wanted to surprise you by having the apartment spotless when you got back." He paused and bit his lip in thought. "Although, my version of spotless and yours are probably galaxies away."

The younger man grinned and conceded that Jack was probably right. "I wonder what the rest of the team would say if they could see you right now," Ianto mused, running his fingers up the seams on Jack's mid-thigh length dress.

Jack's brow furrowed as turned fully in his lover's arms and scowled at Ianto. "That's not funny," he murmured, pulling off the marigolds and allowing them to fall the floor as he pressed his lips against Ianto's.

"I dunno," Ianto replied, letting his hands skim over Jack's arse, pulling the black material up. He felt his heartbeat increase and his breath hitch when he discovered that Jack wasn't wearing anything other than suspenders beneath the dress.

"I think Owen would quite like to see you like this."

Jack whimpered when Ianto slid a hand up the back of his thigh, brushing the top of his suspenders teasingly. "If you're about to do what I think you are, quit talking about Owen!"

The Welshman smirked and pressed Jack even further back against the sink, kissing him hotly. Even though he had been exhausted previously, the outfit Jack was wearing, mingled with the steaming kisses, had managed to draw him from his drowsiness.

Jack supported himself with one hand against the counter and wrapped a long leg around Ianto's waist, pulling him as close as possible. With his free hand, Jack unfastened Ianto's suit trousers and allowed them, and his underwear, to pool around the younger man's ankles.

When Jack pulled his hand away, Ianto looked up at his lover questioningly, only to receive a warm grin in return as the former Time Agent dug around in a pocket at the front of his apron.

He let out a triumphant yell when his fingers curled around what he was looking for and Ianto laughed when he realised what Jack had stashed in the cleaning outfit.

"You clean with lube in your pocket?" he laughed, taking the tiny tube from Jack's hand and flipping the minuscule lid open.

Jack shrugged his shoulders, shuddering with pleasure when Ianto slid one, then two fingers inside him without warning. "I had a feeling you'd get hot and bothered seeing me like this," he whispered, his hands clutching at Ianto's forearms painfully when talented fingers found the tiny bundle of nerves buried inside him.

"You could have been a boy scout," Ianto managed to mutter through gritted teeth when Jack pressed against him, rubbing their matching erections against each other.

Whatever retort Jack had ready died when Ianto pressed hard against his prostate, making Jack throw his head back and moan loudly, biting his lip to stop himself from full-out screaming.

Ianto felt the leg around his waist tighten and he smirked at the desperate glint in Jack's blue eyes. Removing his fingers and coating himself with the little lube that remained, he steadied one hand on the counter behind Jack as he slid inside the other man's waiting body in one movement.

It didn't take long for either man to loose what little self-control and soon Ianto was pumping into Jack's body with all the strength he could muster. Trying to push them both just that little bit harder in an attempt to get as much pleasure out of the moment as possible.

All too soon, Jack's internal muscles were tightening around Ianto and he was coming with a cry of his lover's name – not caring about the neighbours this time as Ianto's orgasm shortly followed his own.

x

The Rift had been quiet all week, which was both fantastic and the worst thing ever. The bright side was that they didn't have to run off at all hours to retcon the entire city after a sighting of an alien trying to do his weekly washing in the local Laundromat.

The downside, Ianto thought, was that every one was now sitting around the Hub waiting – _wishing _- for something to happen.

And waiting lead to boredom, and boredom led to arguments as far as Torchwood Three were concerned; usually between Gwen and Owen.

As he organised the coffee cups for the third time that day, Ianto cocked his head to the side, trying to listen in on what the pair were arguing about this time.

"I'm not saying you have to be perfectly neat but tidying up once in a while isn't going to kill you!" Gwen cried, waving a hand around at Owen's workstation.

The doctor looked around him in confusion. "And I'm saying, I don't know what your problem is. It's not your desk, it's mine. Besides, it doesn't look so bad to me…"

Ianto scoffed and rolled his eyes, knowing there were at least three chocolate bar wrappers, two crisp packets and a half empty – and flat – can of 'bloke coke' on Owen's desk.

At that was just the area of the desk that was in sight, he didn't even want to think about what he would find in the drawers should he ever look – which he had no intention of doing in the foreseeable future.

"You can't possibly think your desk is tidy!"

Owen shrugged his shoulders and turned back to his computer screen, trying to tune out the annoyed screech of the young Welshwoman. "Whatever," he muttered under his breath, jabbing violently as his cupboard.

Ianto looked up when he heard Jack join in the conversation. "She's got a point, Owen," their boss commented as he passed the workstation. "You could do with tidying up after yourself every once in a while."

The doctor rolled his eyes. "Says the man who has his own personal maid, complete with maid's outfit, no doubt."

Jack smirked evilly and patted Owen on his shoulder. "Owen… Owen… Owen…" He let out a disapproving noise. "How do you know _I'm _not the one with the maid's outfit."

The look on Owen's face as he realised what Jack just said was almost worth the embarrassed flush Ianto could feel colouring his cheeks.

XxX


End file.
